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ClearingHurdles

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Welcome to another edition of Vivus Vita (Living Life). Today’s topic is about the hurdles life often puts in our paths.

No matter how favoured someone’s life may be, they, along with the rest of us, will have to face challenges and difficulties, the hurdles, that life invariably throws into our paths. Sadly, some have far more to contend with than others. Why is a mystery, at least it is to me, who has had the misfortune to face more than I believe any one individual is supposed to, but that is another story.

Irrespective of the cause, the hurdles have to be faced and hopefully overcome. How that is done is very much an individual matter. Some people have inbuilt mechanisms that help. Psychologists reckon those are developed in early childhood through the auspices of parents or guardians who have provided a secure, safe, and emotionally stable home. I most certainly benefited from such in the first early years of my life. Other people, however, have not been so fortunate. Therefore, when hurdles are thrown in their way, they have to learn on-the-hoof, so to speak. That is far from easy, and these unfortunate souls can easily fall in the process. I have known both situations. Sadly, my wonderfully happy early years came to an abrupt end after which I had little guidance, and in fact had to face many a hurdle I previously had no way of knowing even existed.

No matter which camp someone resides in, inbuilt mechanisms or none, everyone will, at some stage, encounter events never met before. It can feel as if all is lost and we have no option but to concede. To allow the proverbial steamroller to flatten us. But, that is never the case. There are always options, even if they initially appear beyond our abilities. Believe me, it is a fearful, often terrifying, position to be in, however, we do not have to concede. All of us, until we are forced to call upon it, tend to be unaware of the inherent strength that lies within us. This is true irrespective of whether our childhood was happy and secure or not.

Those of us who have had to face challenge after challenge and difficulty after difficulty usually learn as we progress. Unhappily, similar circumstances and events have a habit of repeating, but not always. We, along with everyone else, also have to face hurdles we have not encountered before. At least we have some experience, as unpleasant as it has been, from which we can draw some hope. If we cleared a hurdle before, there is a chance we can do so again. As I read that now, it sounds a bit flippant. Believe me when I say it is not meant to be. I may only imagine, if the situation is bad for us, how much worse it is for those who have, so far, been spared. Does that mean they, or any of us for that matter, have to flounder until we have cleared a similar hurdle? That would be terrible. I shudder at the thought. Thankfully, there are ways for us to learn. Life is full of lessons, no matter where on its path we may be. Of course, as already explained, there is previous experience. However, where that does not exist, or is irrelevant to the present situation, there are other varied assets we may call upon. Far more these days than when I was younger. Many of the hurdles we face, besides the physical, have an emotional and psychological impact. To manage those, the services of a therapist, psychologist, or wellbeing organisation may be obtained. However, these are not the only resources available to us.

Another is books. There are, of course, self-help books, but perhaps sometimes of greater help are the personal accounts, memoir, autobiography, and biography in which authors share their own, or other people’s experiences. These can open a doorway or ignite the proverbial lightbulb in our heads. We may find our own challenge or difficulty has been encountered before. We may then see how the writer, or subject of the book, dealt with, and hopefully cleared the hurdle, and how they went on to live their life after. In reading these accounts, we will hopefully gain an insight that we may then utilise with our own dilemma. I would suggest, rather than choosing a celebrities book, though these can be very interesting and still contain material we will find helpful, we look more closely at the accounts of so called ordinary people’s lives. They are often far from ‘ordinary’.

There should be no mistake, many of life’s hurdles are cruel, vicious, and hard to face. And many can continue for long periods. That does not mean they cannot be conquered, mastered, cleared, or defeated. They can. It may take time, and for sure, the memories are unlikely to fade into oblivion, but we can go on to live a reasonably successful and fulfilled life. I am a witness to that fact, though the hurdles never stopped presenting themselves.

You may feel some of what I have shared sounds simplistic. It is not meant to be. As I well know, managing life’s issues is not easy, but I am here to let you know it can be done.

This comes to you with my hopes that your hurdles will be small and easily managed. But if they are not, remember you are stronger than you may credit yourself, and you, along with the rest of us, can clear the hurdle and go on to live your life.

Copyright © T. R. Robinson, all rights reserved.

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